Thursday, June 2, 2011

Ice Cream is a Worthy Band-Aid

So on Monday, after having a glorious day of lounging and getting to bask in the sun, my Texas skin tans nicely in the Wisconsin sun, after all. I went to a friend’s house and was enjoying the company of my sweetie and my friends. I got a call from my father. My mom was in the hospital. My mom has not always been in the best of health. I was not overly shocked that she was in the hospital, and then I learned the circumstances. I was knocked on my ass, left the party in tears then I invited people to my place to distract me.

The first thing I must say is that my sweetie (@TheEduHater) has been amazing. He pets and loves on me, I am fairly sure at this point he would hide the body for me. My friends have come through and offered support that I don’t think I deserve, and I love them for it. Whether they know the full story or just part of the story they are there with wine, movies, ice cream and just simple support.

I have been effectively knocked on my ass and I am eating my feelings. Ice cream is something; I don’t eat a lot, even when I was heavier. Some how though once I heard about my mother all I wanted was ice cream. My friend came and picked me up and we bought a tub. Eating ice cream was easier than thinking why wondering if I should have been there. I have been raw, sad, and getting progressively more numb about it all. I know I need to step away and focus on myself, my goals and stuff but I feel like I need to shed my emotions first.

I love my mom. I have not always been the best daughter but I try and some how I have made her proud. I am not attentive enough, this I know. I promise I will be better though, I swear.

5 comments:

  1. Hope that things turn out okay. I know how you feel about the attentive thing. It is a hard balance - Katie J

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  2. Sometimes ice cream is simply required. Hope all goes well for your mom.

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  3. Sending you love & positive energy! Hope things shake out alright!

    Sarah @ Thinfluenced

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  4. We all need to medicate sometimes. The thing is being strong enough to not fall into a rut and get consumed by that need. To quote one of my favorite author's, Jim Butcher, "We're all equally human. All equally naked before the jaws of pain."

    You're strong and you've got lots of friends to get you through this. I beat myself up over things like this, too, but when you feel yourself start to step on that path, stop yourself and try to focus in a different direction.

    Sending good thoughts and energy to you and your mom, as well as the rest of your family.

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  5. Thanks for all the energy and good thoughts everyone. With out it I am sure I would still be sucking down ice cream.

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